A Home For The Heart

I spent the first few years of my married life moving from one place to another. I believe I totalled our number of homes to be 11 in five short years. I remember walking furniture and home stores dreaming of what my home would look like whenever we finally were able to settle. My heart longed for a place that was my own, a place that had little pieces of me and the people I loved up everywhere, a place that showed my creativity.

Years were starting to pass me by and the security of a home seemed like a distant, never to be realized fantasy. My husband was gone most of the time due to his commitment to the military. I was in a place in my life where nothing seemed to turn out the way I thought it would. I eventually became depressed and desperate for happiness, security and peace from what felt like an unwavering storm that raged around me.

I had the opportunity to spend a quiet evening at home tonight and after tucking my precious son in to bed I went out into the living room to close the windows and the blinds. I found myself stuck by the windows peering out into the sky full of dark clouds and a slight breeze that seemed to quiet everything around me. Even though the threat of a storm was all around me I felt safe, warm and secure inside my home. In fact I had an overwhelming sense of peace. Instead of looking scary and threatening to me, the clouds looked beautiful. The thought of rain seemed to quiet my soul.

I love nights like these. It is a time of reflection. A time when God reveals the beauty in the storms. The inexpressible peace that comes in the midst of the storm. You see, I spent most of those turbulent few first years of marriage only focusing on the storm and what I was lacking. Now, with God as the center of my life I face the storms in life and focus on the beauty and peace that can only be experienced during turbulent storms.

Our hearts were designed to search for a home, a place of belonging and rest. I spent many years depending upon others, finances, degrees, careers, marriage and pregnancy trying to find rest for my weary heart.

Have you ever felt like that? Do you ever feel that when you grasp for something in life it slips through your fingers and disappears? In my time of reflection tonight the Lord spoke to my heart. He was calling me to a deeper, more intimate walk with Him. Our foundation is where it all begins. Without the proper foundation we crumble when the storms comes through.

I pray that your heart would find its home. Not a temporary home, but a permanent home. A place where you feel safe, loved, secure and valued. There is a beautiful song by Trevor Davis called "As Bold As A Lion" and in it he says "as I rise from the sinking, I feel just like the sun, and as I rise I am thinking I want this for everyone...". I want this for everyone. The love and the peace that God has given me is what many search for and few ever find. I pray that you would search for it with all your heart.

"Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash." Matthew 7:24-27